Guest Blogger: His Cancer Caregiver Journey

Recently, I was contacted by a man who found my blog and wanted to share a story of survival from a caregiver’s point of view. He introduced himself as Cameron Von St. James, and said that “his wife was diagnosed with an extremely rare and deadly cancer called mesothelioma.  Normally when diagnosed with mesothelioma, a person has a life expectancy of about 3-12 months, but after intense treatment and recovery, she is still here seven years later.”

It’s an honor to pass along his story of hope and faith because it defines what we say in our wedding vows, “for better or for worse.” Thank you, Cameron!

Helping My Wife Through Cancer
By: Cameron Von St. James

I can clearly remember the date November 21, 2005. This was the day that my wife found out that she had malignant pleural mesothelioma, and the day that I began caring for a cancer patient, a job I definitely was not prepared for. My wife and I had celebrated the birth of our daughter Lily just three months prior, and we never imagined having to spend our first Christmas as a family fighting cancer.

Prior to leaving the hospital, I knew that being a caregiver for a cancer patient would be difficult. After the doctor told us about possible treatments that we could pursue, I waited for my wife to express interest in any of the options he had laid out for us. However, she was completely silent, and I realized that she was in shock. I knew she needed help, and I made the choice for us to go to Boston to see a mesothelioma specialist named Dr. David Sugarbaker.

Our lives were very chaotic over the next few months. Heather and I used to work before her diagnosis; however, once she was diagnosed, she could not work anymore, and I could only work part-time in order to care for her and Lily. I was overwhelmed with responsibilities and often thought I would lose Heather despite all our efforts to beat the cancer.  I couldn’t help but imagine scenarios where Heather passed away and I was left a poor, widowed single father raising a daughter who would never really know her mother. These fears and the pressures of caregiving often caused me to break down in tears.  I had moments of weakness, but I never let Heather see them.  I knew that she needed me to be strong, and that the last thing she needed was to see my fears.

Thanks to many family and friends, Heather and I were offered everything from kind words of encouragement to financial assistance to help us during this time, help that we desperately needed. If there were one thing that can make caring for a cancer patient easier, that one thing would be accepting help from others. I learned the hard way that there is no room for pride or stubbornness in a cancer fight.  Accepting even the smallest offer of help can be a weight off your shoulders, and will remind  you that you are not alone in the fight.

There are not many things that are as difficult as caring for a cancer patient. You will experience a range of emotions as you adhere to your job as a caregiver. However, this is not a job that you can quit because it is hard, and you cannot let your emotions overtake you. It is important to use every resource you have to help you to maintain your sanity, and most importantly – never give up hope, no matter what.

Heather won her mesothelioma battle after months of intense and grueling treatments that included surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. She is cancer free today, over seven years later. Furthermore, I decided to return to school and pursue a degree in Information Technology.

After all of the hardships we had to endure and the lessons I learned from them, I was prepared to go back to school and get my degree two years after Heather’s diagnosis. I am happy to say that I graduated with honors and was the student graduation speaker. During my graduation address, I informed my classmates to always have hope, and if they do, they can accomplish more than they have ever imagined.  Lily and her mother were there in the audience to cheer me on, and that was the greatest reward of all.

Gratitude to God for touching people through "Cancer Chronicles"!

Just a few things people are saying about Bill Williams’ journey to glorify God through gratitude detailed in “Cancer Chronicles” are -

“…the book is a treasure to us.”

“truly inspiring…”

“Captivating. I couldn’t put it down.”

“This is one of the best collections of thoughts and prayers that could have ever been assembled. I sat down and read the whole thing. I've got to tell you that it made me smile the whole way through because I got to personally see Bill Williams and Jan Williams in action and knew that what I was reading was exactly what I had witnessed firsthand. This book will be one of the most highly regarded in my collection.”

Bill Dockrey

“Cancer Chronicles was so inspirational - a real tribute to a man who through his faith fought a courageous battle with cancer. I was moved by Bill Williams' courage and the love and dedication of his family for sharing his words with the world.”

MaryAnne Beatty

“Several years ago, this friend of mine -- Bill Williams -- was diagnosed with late-stage multiple myeloma while in his early fifties. And then he contracted spinal meningitis and nearly died. It might be natural to respond, ‘that's not fair -- no man that young should have that many physical problems.’ The physical ills he endured did test his faith, as he affirmed in an email he sent to his friends following his recovery from the meningitis. Yet they also made him steadfast in his dependence on the Lord:

In “Cancer Chronicles” Bill said, “Thanks to our Lord and Savor Jesus Christ we remain steadfast. We have kept our eyes fixed on our Savor who is, the author and perfector of our faith (Hebrews 12:2); and have casts our burdens on our Heavenly Father and He has sustained us (Psalms 55:22). We observe God's providential hand in all things, especially our difficulties, and so we thank Him for the deepening of our faiths. Jan and I believe that these illnesses are not random but designed for the good of His children - count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness (James 1:1-2). All of my illnesses and recovery have produced increased steadfastness and comfort. It has been difficult yet comforting. He makes us rest more and more upon Him. We are thankful for all He brings our way because we benefit long term."

I have recently reread all of his letters, which all have a similar tone of trust and dependence on God. These letters have been compiled into a new book along with some meditations and discussion questions. I highly recommend this book. Rereading the book has reminded me why I appreciated my friendship with Bill so much.”

Terry Enns, Pastor of Grace Bible Church in Granbury, Texas

Write your own review on www.amazon.com. Search Cancer Chronicles and Bill Williams and click on the small link for reviews.

If you feel led, you can also share your testimony with others about how God has changed your life through trials. Your story or quote would be published here on my blog. Email me at: melwrenbrown@gmail.com.

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Grief Reveals Our Inner Truth

Grief Reveals Our Inner Truth

“The darker the night, the brighter the stars,

The deeper the grief, the closer is God!”

― Fyodor Dostoevsky, Crime and Punishment

Grief takes many forms. Perhaps it follows the loss of a job, a failed marriage, regret, depression, or watching someone you love die. Grief inspires change, sometimes for constructive growth and other times the instigator of self-destruction. We have a choice.

Grief does not define me, but it has transformed me and revealed who I am as Christ’s bride. I am valuable to Him, and nothing I’ve ever done could have changed that when I began a relationship with Him age the age of 10.

In the midst of my father’s death, I couldn’t escape the drowning sensation of the loss leveraging my doubts against my faith. But, God’s promises proved to prevail and part the seas through the depth of my unbelief.

About two years ago, I recall vividly, being hunched over in the shower, doubled over in racking sobs. I prayed and cried out to my heavenly Father, telling Him the anguish of losing my dad. Like the fierceness of being caught in a hurricane, the most soothing hug enveloped me, and I sensed that Jesus had His healing arms around my shoulders…and He was weeping too. The calmest place for me to be was in the eye of that storm until it passed.

That experience is one of the most authentic moments that still penetrate my heart, and I felt overawed with the purest joy of knowing Jesus. He literally cries with me when I’m distraught, and He longs to rock me to sleep at night during those difficult times so I’ll learn to be dependent on Him.

Hebrews 11:1 says, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” This tells me that during those times when I wonder if God is actually listening to me because He hasn’t answered prayers in my time frame, I still must have faith. Faith, like life, cannot be based on my feelings but rather obedience, carried out by acts of belief that I know He’s always there for me, even when I don’t “feel” Him.  

Grief reveals our inner truth. It does not lie. It responds to who we are in our hearts and is reflective of our relationship with God.

Praise God for His Hope During Trials in "Cancer Chronicles"!

This past week, I’ve sung praises to God for all who have sent letters to express how much “Cancer Chronicles” has affected you and brought you to a new understanding of God. You’ve expressed that you’ve been enlightened as to how to honor and give gratitude to the Lord even in times of distress. From personal experience, when I’ve asked God to walk me through the wilderness, it’s later that I can see the miracles and lessons He let me experience. I pray you will continue to write and share your testimony with others. Thank you.

More quotes about newly released “Cancer Chronicles” book. Available on amazon or by contacting me at: melwrenbrown@gmail.com

“Astonishing, remarkable, and great! Never have I read anything so captivating. Bill’s journey through his illness, his faith and strong hold onto the Lord was awesome. Bill has truly set an example for myself and many others I pray. Thank you for blessing us with the opportunity to read this book. I could not put it down once I started reading it, and I definitely told everyone about it that would stop and listen to me.”

Danny Moore

“One might assume a psychiatrist would depart entirely from a discussion on faith. Cancer Chronicles is quite the contrary as Bill intertwines faith, hope and science quite eloquently. While I’m certainly not making a comparative statement about his survivors, there are many life lessons for everyone to learn. To be sure, any person in life could learn a great deal about hope, and a persons’ drive to find some meaning in their lives. It is peculiar how at times in life we learn valuable lessons from the most unlikely sources. We will be going about life as we know it, when something out of the blue will catch our attention and speak to something deep within us.”

Robert Daniel Brown Sr.